
Continuing the expeditions of Jeff MacNelly, James Kilpatrick, and Eugene McCarthy, with apologies.
The Ward Heeler
Long thought to be near extinction, this creature is more Cheshire Cat than dinosaur. Appearing in opportune times, the WH greases the skids for a myriad of political adventurers who are willing to place the traditional small tribute in one of the WH’s many pockets. The big handed WH boasts a vestigial memory of centuries of experiences with political fixers, dirty tricksters, and obeisant sanitation workers. It uses its experience to get things done, mostly little things, but nonetheless important things, for the WH is the master of a very small universe. It is the WH that obtained the trash cans, the letters of recommendation, the no-show jobs that cemented the structure of fealty in the thousands of little feifdoms that make up a political organization. However, there are some signs that the Ward Heeler’s realm may be getting bigger. International money launderers and internet bot factories have been seen of late to be merging their skills to affect WH-like results, on a global scale. The Ward Heeler may have disappeared again, but its Cheshire smile is visible all over the internet.
-Danny Grosso